Movies that suck
I’ve noticed lately a number of movies that are only as funny as the trailers used to preview them. Case in point, Men Who Stare at Goats with George Clooney. The previews looked promising with lots of humor. It turns out the joke was on me. I’ve gotten more laughs from a hairball than this movie. Hell, most of it didn’t even make sense but I could have lived with that if there had been something to actually laugh at. Another movie that previewed well but basically sucked was Cop Out with Bruce Willis. I like Bruce and enjoy his humor in movies but in this case the trailer held all the guffaws and the rest of the movie caused my eyelids to droop. I shouldn’t complain, I had a really nice nap and woke up refreshed.
I don’t wear lipstick often but when I do I want it to actually stay, you know, on my lips. I don’t want the rim of my coffee cup laced with an imprint of my smoocher. To minimize the grossness factor I have to wipe the rim off with my thumb. Then I have to wipe my thumb off with a napkin so I don’t get lipstick on my keyboard. Lipstick and keyboard keys do not make for a good combination. Of course then I have to reapply the lipstick and the vicious cycle continues…lather, rinse, repeat.
When I got my laptop it was loaded with Windows Vista. Whoever came up with this operating system should be forced to listen to Tiny Tim’s rendition of Stairway to Heaven for 24 hours straight (including potty breaks.) I consider myself savvy when it comes to computers but even after a year of having Vista I can’t find my way around. It’s like trying to navigate a complicated maze situated in the bowels of an ancient pyramid located in the lost city of Atlantis.
Friends who aren’t friends
If you’re going to drop me like a hot potato please tell me why. If I did something wrong let me know so I can own it, explain it, apologize or do whatever needs to be done to try and fix it. If I did nothing wrong, tell me so I don’t feel like a worthless piece of dog doo.
Catalog companies that won’t give up
It happens every year right before the holidays. I get catalogs in the mail from companies I’ve never done business with before. You name it there’s a catalog for it. What bugs me is that even though I don’t order any holiday wares from them they continue to send me catalogs throughout the year. Seriously, don’t they ever check their records to determine who has never ordered from them and then eliminate such slackers from their database? There is always the “this is the last catalog you will receive from us” catalog to look forward to. Then there is the “this is your VERY last chance to order before we never send you another catalog” catalog. This is followed 6 weeks later by the “order NOW or you will NEVER be able to order from us again EVER you schmuck” catalog. Ho hum.
The little piece of lint the vacuum won’t pick up
So there you are, running the vacuum and minding your own business when you see it. One little piece of lint that you know in your heart is stuck to the carpet and is not going to allow itself to get sucked up by your almighty Dyson. Experience tells you that if you run the vacuum over the lint it is not going to budge but you try anyway. Nothing happens. You try again with a little more gusto and still the lint remains. You are determined that this time the lint will not beat you so you run the vacuum over the lint again and again and again. By now frustration is mounting because you cannot fathom how something so tiny be so much more powerful than a vacuum that can suck up twenty pounds of dog hair. Finally, sensing defeat, you reach down and loosen the lint from the carpet and…throw it back on the rug to get vacuumed up. (Or maybe that’s just me.)
For as many things that bug me there is much more that doesn’t. I don’t mind melty ice cream or when a bar of soap disintegrates in my hand in the middle of a shower. What kind of things bug you? Tell me; nine times out of ten they bug me too. 🙂